48 hours. . . .?

The days have literally ticked by so slowly this past week… the reality is slowly setting in, but I don’t think it has in it’s entirety. I’ve been so blessed with the help of Colby’s family to make our civil ceremony beautiful and emotionally from my family and close friends back home.

In two days, I get to marry my best friend. I think when we set October 14th as our date, we thought it was far off. We had 3 months when we decided that’s the day we would get married, and it seemed really far away then, and it’s come really quickly, besides this past week of course, that seriously couldn’t have gone any slower.

I always knew I had the potential to be a raging bridezilla, up until yesterday though it hadn’t emerged. I figure that might be because this wedding is so tiny (20 people. . woo!) that it wouldn’t happen. It happened yesterday, and it was quite the tantrum.
My wedding seamstress was so unprofessional and slack that I was 2 shy steps for needing someone to restrain me from beating the crap out of her. Thankfully she doesn’t actually suck at her job and my dress turned out really nice (I’ll post pictures after Monday. . .since Colby isn’t allowed to see) I’m very pleased with it. I didn’t expect to like another dress so much, since my actual “Wedding Dress” that my Mother cried over and I had my “Say yes to the dress moment” is back in Virginia where our bigger and a lot more personal wedding ceremony and reception will be held (I know I’ll be going total bridezilla on that one. . . oops!)

The significance of the 14th goes back to my relationship with my Great Grandparents, Ma and Papa. Papa was one of my dearest and closest friends. . .he was my runaway buddy. I always fled to their house when I was having a rough time and Papa always listened and knew when to make fun of me and when to be serious. They wed on the 14th of October, and so I want to, too.
One of the hardest things about preparing for this wedding, and for even being excited really. . . is that my family isn’t here. The other night it hit me like a brick that I was getting married and none of my family is here to see it. Even though our “big wedding” with our own written vows and my gorgeous dress my parents purchased is around the corner as well. . . and even though this wedding is so tiny. . . this is me getting married without my Mom and Dad, without my siblings, without all of my family and without my best friends, and that’s been a tough pill to swallow these past few days.

I didn’t imagine as a little girl I would be getting married and my family wouldn’t be there. But this is how things have worked out and honestly have to be, sacrifices aren’t easy, but in the end this will all be worth it.

I can’t imagine my life without Colby in it. I can’t think of something more meant to be than my relationship with him. I can’t think of someone more perfect for me, in every single way. I knew him before this life.. . my spirit knew his before we ever walked in physical bodies on earth and I’m thankful for that. He is my other half, he completes me, and thankfully he understands me so easily. Every struggle that has been thrown at us to get to this point in our relationship and our lives together has only made our bond and our love for each other stronger and so even though at the time I cursed those issues, was mad, cried, hated God for it, it’s been a trial that has brought us to where we are now. We’re getting married, because we’re ready for it, despite what anyone else wants to think.

So we get married Monday. My dress and his outfit are set, our Marriage Commissioner is booked, our marriage license ready, tissues everywhere. We’re doing it, and I’m so excited and happy and ready.

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I’m getting married!!!

Today, I’ve been doing some last minute planning for Colby and my little civil wedding next week. . . . and it’s really got me into a lot of reminiscing on the past.

I remember being a student and Virginia Western Community College, sitting in the cafeteria with a few of my school buddies which ironically were all guys. . . anyway I was typing on skype to Colby during my lunch break. Colby and I had only known each other at that point for maybe a month or two. All of these guys that had girlfriends of their own picked on me and joked around at how stupid it was to have a crush on someone so far away. They tried convincing me that it would never work out, that people cheat in long distance relationships and that it was a long shot.
I remember the first time I told Colby I loved him. It was awkward and I was embarrassed, but it was exciting to hear him say it back eventually. I think back to how surreal it was to be running through the Salt Lake City airport and seeing him in person for the first time. Whenever I think back on that, and remember it makes me emotional.
I literally, have the most perfect man in my life. I don’t know what I did to be so extremely blessed with someone so compassionate and caring. I almost feel undeserving of him, because he is that fantastic! Whenever I realize that I get to be his WIFE I get to love him and I get to see him every day, it is the most incredible thing and it makes me so unbelievably happy! It’s amazing how love grows, how I thought last year in July when we met in person for the first time that I loved him. I did, but, it’s grown so much and I can’t imagine my life without my best friend.

We’ve made it a long way, we’ve experienced a lot. We have an appreciation for each other that is rare. I can’t take him for granted, because I am always remembered of what it was like to not have him around. This post is really jumbly and doesn’t exactly fit right together, but I just had to say that I’m so excited and happy and I’m so in love. . . I’m seriously so in love and I can’t wait to marry my best friend. I feel so blessed and happy and I just want to tell everybody that I come in contact with that I get to marry my best friend on the 14th.

Everyone said that we wouldn’t work out, no one had faith that we could withstand the distance and we’re proving everyone wrong. Love can’t be affected by distance and I’m a great example of that.
3,000 miles apart and we’ve closed the gap and are starting our life together. Yay!

I’ll stop this sappy post now. Sorry guys >.<

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10202085584281413&set=a.2237787224464.134477.1241514074&type=1&theater

Rough Transition

I knew this wasn’t going to be easy.  But sometimes during the day I feel like I underestimated the heartache and stress that moving to Canada would bring.  I expected the sadness and the missing familiarity of my home and my family.  But I kind of expected it to have somewhat worn of in the slightest by now.  . . . . sadly, not so much.  Then again I don’t know what I was expecting, I haven’t even been here two weeks yet.  Idunno…..

My days are mostly spent alone, minus the company of my kitten Luna and the dogs, Sage and Callie.  I clean and clean and maybe go outside and walk around the neighborhood until I realize I am being bitten like mad by mosquitoes that are the size of oreo cookies.  Then I clean some more. Maybe mess around on Sims. Stalk someones facebook for the 4th time that day. . . I have Re-read everything I already know about immigrating, just so I don’t forget. . . and then I make dinner and Colby comes home and I can just be happy and content until I have to say goodnight and close the door to my room some 4 hours after he gets home from work. . . . and then I brush and brush and brush and brush myyyy hair wonderin’ when will my life begin! . . . . . just kidding, but seriously whoever can catch that reference can have an oreo cookie :)  But that’s about what I do. .. or have done every day (minus Colby’s day off, those days have been much more entertaining) 

You don’t appreciate work-flow and a paycheck as much until it is no longer even an option.  I honestly would love to be working right now, despite how lazy I love being. Not working freaking sucks.  Being lazy gets old after about 72 hours. You realize, this permanent vacation sucks and that’s just that.  *Le sigh*.  I haven’t had the emotional stability to find a hobby and have a routine of doing something I genuinely enjoy every day. Colby takes the car to work, and even if he had me drive him to work giving me the car, it’s not like I know where anything is and I get really anxiety stricken being in public without him.  I do sincerely miss my job at Chuck-e-cheese. I miss my co-workers and my bosses and I just miss hating going to work every day cause I didn’t appreciate being able to work. I miss that. 

I should probably have just bought stock in Tim Hortons since every other craving I have is for their coffee or Tim Bits.   I need to curb that addiction asap. 

Whenever we go out into public I am awkwardly fascinated with every human being my eyes can find.  It’s really stupid and an immature thought process, but everyone here [to my knowledge] is Canadian. They just live their lives here every day, nbd. Living in a different country, [not that Canada is really that different from the states anyway . . . ] just makes you realize there is just so many people everywhere outside of your home country bubble.   The culture is different here.  People talk different, express themselves differently, act differently, live . . . differently than what I am used to in Virginia, and from what I’ve seen in the little amount of the United States, I don’t know if that makes me sound ignorant or not, but I just never thought about life in a different country. . . maybe that’s just because I never in a million years thought that I would ever be an immigrant.  It’s been quite a teeny culture shock. Which I wasn’t exactly expecting so.  . . . surprise to me! It’s been interesting to overhear opinions about the united states from people living outside of the country. It has opened my eyes to how the USA is viewed and how on often occasion we make ourselves look like massive idiots.

There has been a lot of changes all at once, and it’s hard for me to get a grip sometimes.  It’s A LOT of stress crammed into one little setting and anyone that knows me well, knows I crack so bad under stress and anxiety.  Getting engaged, moving, adjusting to living in a completely different environment [Side note to that statement, my nose has been SO dry since I got into Canada and it drives me insane. I’ve never in my life experienced a bloody nose before, I was oddly proud of that and now Canada has to go and ruin it! grr]  I have  felt like an outsider and completely different from everyone else around me.  I listen to the way I talk, the expressions and words I use and not that being “me” is bad at all but I just feel extremely out of place.  I don’t like feeling like a zoo animal, that everyone needs to come and look at me and observe me. . .  I don’t like feeling the pressure to just be super happy and not have sad feelings of being in Canada now.  It’s hard, and I anticipate it’s not going to get any better soon. 

But, despite the ache and sorrow that I do experience daily, I am happy.  Being able to see Colby every day is indescribable and I can’t begin to put into words the joy I feel when he walks into the door after work.  Smelling him, hugging him, kissing him, feeling his presence is just so amazing and I appreciate the work he is putting in to making me as comfortable as possible here in Kelowna, it is by no means an easy task putting up with stressed out Madylon, but he does it so well and is such a positive influence in my life. I just am so in love with him. 

As per huge request from my blog followers, a picture of my gorgeous engagement ring

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Colby did a fantastic job at picking it out, and also did a great job at finding resources and approval from the only other person that knows me as well if not slightly more, my cousin Allyson.  It’s absolutely gorgeous and I stare at it for quite some time every day marveling in how beautiful and special it is. 

Anyway, it’s almost 2am here in Kelowna and I am awfully tired and ready to pass out.  I haven’t been sleeping well the past few days [I’m positive it’s just stress related] but I’m going to try actual force to go to sleep now. 

Hope everyone is doing fantastic and enjoying their summer. Cause I am! 

 

xoxo

Madylon 

Hi I live in Kelowna, Canada. . . that sounds so weird!

All I can really say right now is. . . Wow.

Saturday traveling sucked. All of the night before I laid in a recliner and weeped uncontrollably because I couldn’t believe I was actually about to do this.  I was absolutely terrified for one, of the planes. I hate flying and taking off scares the holy beejeezus out of me, and two I really had no idea how adjusting was going to be and three, crossing the border really scares me.

Anyway so we awoke early in the morning on Saturday and my Mom, Dad and Isybelle took Colby and I to RDU. We checked our bags in and got our boarding passes and I did what I have been dreading since the decision was made. I said goodbye to my family.  I cried almost the entire first flight. Especially taking off. I’m pretty sure people thought I was a basket case.

Our layovers were in LA and Salt Lake City.  We were unable to find any celebrities in LA sadly and it was really awesome because in the Salt Lake City airport again, since that is where Colby and met in person almost one year ago.

We arrived in Spokane, Washington around 3:50 (Pacific time. . . .it was almost 7 back home)  We were greeted by Serenna, Colby’s little sister and his cousin Kyle and Auntie Carey. We hit the road for the 5 1/2 drive back up to Canada and thankfully we made it through the land border.

I randomly woke up at 6am the next day (9am Virginia time) and started my day.  We went and got Tim Hortons (I was seriously the happiest person ever) and got some supplies and such from Walmart to begin unpacking and making my bedroom more “Home-ey”  Colby bought me a swiffer mop thing because their entire house is hardwood and the puppy hair is everywhere! So I spent a good part of my time yesterday just marveling in how the swiffer works so well.

Something really amazing happened yesterday. It’s never happened before and it felt so weird.  For starters. I have this “I miss home and familiarity” thoughts in the back of my mind all the time.  It hasn’t gone away and honestly I don’t think it will.  But yesterday walking out of Walmart.  I was just smiling, and I just felt happy. It wasn’t like my usual “try” and be happy I was literally just happy for no reason and it was one of the coolest feelings ever.  I was genuinely happy.  I don’t know, I just thought it was amazing and I’m happy that I’ve been able to experience that, especially since I am prepared for this transition to be difficult and sad.

So I’m completely moved in (Minus my boxes that are in route and going to be shipped) I have my room set up. I’m excited to put my pictures up and just have everything complete.

I’m excited to be here. Kelowna is a beautiful place and I am excited to be able to call it my home now. . . even though that is extremely bittersweet.

I love you all.

xoxo

Madylon

If you like it then you should-a put-a ring on it.

Interesting how 10 days can go by so fast all of the sudden. When before it felt like eternity. 

Weird how 6 months felt like forever, when in reality it was gone in the blink of an eye. 

June 26th, last Wednesday my Father, Mother and I packed our car and drove up to the Dulles airport to pick up Colby.  Figures that as my nerves were about to kill me that his flight ended up being delayed about 2 hours.  The joy that I felt running through the baggage claim into his arms is indescribable.  The wait was over. . . . finally. 

Over the next two days we spent touring D.C, visiting museums and spending time with my Aunt and Uncle that live in Maryland,  on our way back we swung by Richmond to visit my Sister and Brother-in-law and see their new home since they just moved.  I was exhausted that night when we finally got by to Roanoke and settled around 1 am.  

Colby creeped into my room the next morning early at 6 am to tell me he wanted to watch the sun-rise with him. I was dead tired but grabbed a blanket and we went and sat outside.  I pointed out the hill that I used to sled down as a child, and we goofed around and talked about several things.   The sun began cresting over the trees and he stood up, and pulled me up with him (I was wrapped in a fluffy blanket and a yawny mess.. . . not sure why since I am the Queen of living off of no sleep)  But he hugged me and just kinda stared at me,  I had kind of put two and two together now and realized this was really happening.  He began telling me how beautiful and special I was, and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. He said a bunch of wonderful sweet things and I began bawling (Classic) He got down on one knee in the dewy wet grass and asked me to marry him, and pulled out the biggest rock ever.  The most gorgeous ring a girl could ever want.  I’m so excited!  We’re engaged! 

That day I couldn’t stop looking at it. I almost had potential to run off the road sometimes because the sparkly-ness of the ring was too distracting.  

We ended up not being able to go camping due to the monsoon weather.  The rain has been terrible!  So we occupied our time with games and visiting places in Roanoke that I like. . . .and then going kayaking and sailboating at the lake on Tuesday. 

We left Wednesday morning for North Carolina to visit with my mom’s side of the family.  We’ve had a nice visit here and my nerves are setting in to leave tomorrow morning. We got Krispy Kreme doughnuts last night and grilled out at Nana and Gramps’s until we went and saw fireworks for Independence Day. It’s been real. 

So we leave tomorrow morning. Crazy. I never thought the day would come. It’s weird and scary and so exciting.  I’m not looking forward to flying since I am not a fan of airplanes, but at least I’ll have Colby there to calm me down, he’s good at that. 

I’m SO excited to see Colby’s sister Serenna. I’ve missed her face and I’m looking forward to having a live-in best friend. 

Anyway, I’m off to enjoy the rest of my day in the States! 

xoxo

Madylon