Gluten free. . .

I haven’t posted in forever, and I don’t have an excuse so I’m sorry.  Not that anyone really reads this anyway but it’s kind of like a journal for me (That is public obviously) and I should be writing in more for my own sake.

Anyway, so recently I’ve found out that I have either Celiac disease or like the worst gluten allergy from hell.

I had symptoms all of my life, but honestly, gluten free and celiac disease wasn’t at all on my radar and I never thought I’d be “that person”

The laundry list of symptoms could go on and on forever.

Coeliac disease or celiac disease in the United States and often celiac sprue) is an autoimmune disorder of the small intestine that occurs in genetically predisposed people of all ages from middle infancy onward.   – – increasingly, diagnoses are being made in asymptomatic persons as a result of increased screening;the condition is thought to affect between 1 in 1,750 and 1 in 105 people in the United States,  and 1 in 100 in the UK.

So obviously Celiac disease is becoming a lot more popular, I’ve read several things stating that could be because of genetically modifying our grains, and that’s why we are seeing such an increase in people being affected by gluten.

Coeliac disease is caused by a reaction to gliadin, a prolamin (gluten protein) found in wheat, and similar proteins found in the crops of the tribeTriticeae (which includes other common grains such as barley and rye).  – – Upon exposure to gliadin, and specifically to three peptides found in prolamins, the enzyme tissue transglutaminase modifies the protein, and the immune system cross-reacts with the small-bowel tissue, causing an inflammatory reaction. That leads to a truncating of the villi lining the small intestine (called villous atrophy). This interferes with the absorption of nutrients because the intestinal villi are responsible for absorption. The only known effective treatment is a lifelong gluten-free diet.While the disease is caused by a reaction to wheat proteins, it is not the same as wheat allergy. ~Wikipedia

Would like to just add because some people don’t get it, Celiac disease is NOT an allergy, it’s an autoimmune disease.  Celiac disease does NOT get better and “go away”

I’d been experiencing so many terrible things like headaches, terrible stomach problems, heartburn, insomnia, mood swings that even sometimes surprised me. . . and so in Mid March after months of suffering I read up on gluten intolerance, gluten allergies and. . . dun dun dun, Celiac disease.

First step – Denial.

Even though I was totally relieved to have found something that was the problem (I had originally thought this was a gallbladder issue and was worried about surgery and getting back into the states to have that done. . . )  I was absolutely completely devastated.  So, gonna admit it, I cried. I cried on Colby, I cried by myself, I cried in the grocery store. Everywhere.  This couldn’t possibly be happening to me (And just so people don’t think I’m being ridiculous, I got it there are worse things out there than cutting gluten out of your life so save me the lecture on how it’s not a big deal)

All I could think about it what I couldn’t eat anymore. Goodbye cake, brownies, biscuits, biscuits and GRAVY, anything baked that I love, pasta, thanksgiving dinner I basically had to kiss goodbye. . .  eating out . . .ect.  I was prepared to put the nail in the coffin and was so upset that I was going to be missing out on everything that I loved.   Going into the grocery store for the first time after choosing to go gluten free was easily one of the most embarrassing experiences of my life because walking down the isles in the store with silent tears and getting some interesting looks from strangers almost scarred me into never going out again.

But, after getting a grip on myself, reading some more, talking to a friend in Canada who is celiac leveled me out a bit and I realized I could “replace” those things with a gluten free alternative. I’ve learned thought that you can’t “replace” anything really, because when you expect it to be like what you had before, you’re up for major disappointment. . . but regardless I have found some bakery items that I love and now crave instead of the “real deal”

After being off of gluten for 2 weeks my stomach was actually digesting correctly, I didn’t have to plan my outings on if there would be a bathroom, and the headaches were GONE! It was wonderful. . . and then the cravings set in.

I’m an emotional eater. It’s a habit that I wish I honestly didn’t have [who really want’s it actually] and I’ve tried to get rid of, and I haven’t succeeded yet. So go figure when things got really rough up here with things I couldn’t control, the first thing I wanted to do, was stuff my face with everything that you honestly shouldn’t really eat anyway, gluten intolerant or not.   I’ve continued to send myself back into this never ending cycle of “Ok I’m eating completely gluten free” to “Just this once won’t hurt” except just that once did hurt, and it didn’t turn into just this once, it turned into a repetitive offense and I was only hurting myself (And annoying Colby because he hates it when I complain about frequent trips to the bathroom, my stomach hurting and horrible headaches)  But I didn’t want to believe that this is really my life now. Gluten free. I keep hoping each time I eat something containing gluten that nothing will happen and that will be a sign that gluten isn’t the problem. . . . and each time I get the sad reassurance that this is the issue, and there isn’t anything I can do about it. . . other than eat Gluten Free.

So I am once again, devoting myself to eating Gluten Free foods ONLY.  Even though it’s been a really difficult pill to swallow, it’s obviously rewarding to live my life without every day headaches and planning my outings by when I need a bathroom.

I’ve found that the reason I’ve carried weight that no matter what I tried to do, couldn’t drop, was a direct result of my gluten problem. Little by little I’ve noticed the scale going down and that’s exciting to me, because it was devastating to me that no one believed me when I said I was trying everything and nothing was working! And now I know why! It wasn’t because I was lazy, it was because my gut has been SO unhealthy and basically I’ve been “starving” myself even though I was eating regularly.

Healthy stomach, healthy you!

“A healthy outside starts from the inside” ~ Robert Urich

I’m starting the 30 day shred with my cousin this coming week, and I’m so stoked to continue to feel better and have more confidence.  Colby and I have set goals to what we can “have” once we both reach our goal weight and so I’m pumped and ready to get this going!   This is a huge life change for me, I’m both nervous and excited about it, because although it does feel like a loss I feel like I’m equally gaining a bunch back.

Anyway, that’s my rant/life story for the day.

Madylon

 

Advertisements